Oscillate Wildly, Newtown

The November 2005 edition of Australian Gourmet Traveller ran a reviewer competition open to all readers--the winning entrant would join the reviewing team for the Australian Restaurant Guide 2007 (cue Homer-Simpson-like daydream coupled with hopeful hyperventilation). Alas I didn't win (obviously... otherwise I'd be writing this in giant font, not tiny) but I thought I'd share my entry anyway.